Steelers head coach Mike Tomlin, known for his no-nonsense approach to the game, stepped up to the podium at a hastily arranged press conference. With his trademark intensity, he declared, “We’re not here to celebrate rainbows, unicorns, or whatever mystical forces these Pride Nights represent. This is about football. And football is about… well, not that.”
Behind him stood a handful of Steelers players nodding solemnly, some clearly unsure of why they were even there, but committed to the bit nonetheless. Tomlin continued, “Look, this team stands for toughness, tradition, and the occasional helmet-swinging brawl. There’s no place for woke or satanic influences in our locker room.”
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